The Dreadful Emotion

If you ever feel the pain, rage and loss associated with being jealous of your partner you have encountered the least productive emotion a relationship can endure. The difficult part of jealousy is it works against our most sensitive areas of self worth, self esteem and self confidence.

Insecurity serves as the basic driver of jealousy. If a relationship base is a healthy state where both partners enjoy the respect and support of the other jealousy does not appear. Once isolation, selfish actions, demeaning comments or other non caring acts begin the spawning ground for jealousy develops. Once jealousy is allowed to exist it's removal is most difficult.

You cannot treat jealousy but you can treat the insecurity that caused it to exist in the first place. Make sure your partner is always involved in your life, is a part of decisions and not isolated as to feel unimportant. If you find a partner does not trust you remember when that feeling did not exist. What has happened in the recent past to promote that lack of trust.

Sometimes nothing has occurred prompting the lack of trust but if some action, some lifestyle change, or some work change is remember attempt to go back to that prior place and time to rebuilt the trust. Jealousy drives a wedge between two partners quickly and deeply with more damaging results than any other emotion. Even money, the bane of all relationships, falls aside as the most damaging for a long term partnership. The best advice is to keep each partner involved in the union with good communication, never secretive, always open so each party actively supports the relationship.

As always,

Gay